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Concepts and Clichés
Welcome to Concepts and Clichés, a blog dedicated to exploring the real-world application of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) in everyday life. This space offers practical insights and thought-provoking reflections tailored for both prospective and current clients and anyone else who is interested in building a deeper understanding of common concepts. Here, you’ll find accessible explanations of CBT principles, common misconceptions (“clichés”), and how these concepts can be used to navigate life’s challenges.
Compulsive Questioning in Relationships: When Love Demands Answers.
Relationships can offer solace, companionship, and a profound sense of security that acts as a buffer against the world's harsh realities. We step into them hoping, sometimes unconsciously, that this bond will somehow inoculate us against emotional pain, fill the voids within, and quiet the anxieties that prickle at the edges of our minds. Yet, for many, the very relationships meant to provide security become the stage for a relentless quest for reassurance, transforming love
Joanna Szczeskiewicz
14 min read
A Multifactor Model of Anger and Irritability: From "Losing It" to Gaining a Sense of Self.
In popular culture, anger it is often portrayed as a hydraulic force that must be "vented" or a moral failing that must be suppressed. Neither view is accurate, and neither leads to long-term change. If you have ever felt the sudden, hot hijack of a rage episode, you know that "calming down" is often impossible in the moment. If you have ever spent days stewing over a rude comment, replaying the scene in your head until you are exhausted, you know that "letting it go" is easi
Joanna Szczeskiewicz
18 min read
"I Like Being Liked, I Just Don't Worry About It"
It’s a universal human truth: most of us like it when people like us. There’s a warmth, a sense of belonging, and an affirmation that comes from positive social regard. It taps into our fundamental need for connection. But there's a crucial distinction between enjoying being liked and worrying about being liked. The former is a natural, healthy response; the latter often becomes a debilitating trap, hindering the very connections we crave. This distinction is at the heart of
Joanna Szczeskiewicz
5 min read
Chronically on Guard: Living Through High-Conflict Divorce
The experience of a high-stakes divorce, an ongoing legal battle, or the raw aftermath of deep emotional wounds often creates a perpetual state of heightened vigilance. It is a feeling of being constantly "on guard," where every new email, every unexpected phone call, or every looming court date can tighten an invisible knot in your stomach. Peace feels like a rare, precious commodity. You likely know the familiar refrains: "Try to relax," or "Take some time for yourself." Yo
Joanna Szczeskiewicz
12 min read
From Autopilot to Authenticity: How to Stop Our Fears from Hijacking Our Interactions.
Introduction: The Sunday Morning Paradox Picture a typical Sunday morning. It is 10:00 AM, the coffee is brewing, and the light is streaming through the kitchen window in that particular, lazy way that suggests a day of rest. You are standing at the counter, and you have a very specific vision of who you are. You see yourself as a patient partner, a loving parent, a person of integrity who values reason and kindness above all else. You have promised yourself—perhaps just last
Joanna Szczeskiewicz
13 min read
"Why am I feeling this way?" When Emotional GPS Uses Outdated Data.
Imagine this scenario: Robert, a successful entrepreneur in his late 40s, a pillar of his community, dedicated and responsible. He’s taking full charge of his aging parent’s care, ensuring every need is met. Yet, during a mundane phone call, when his parent offers a slight criticism about his choice of laundry detergent, Robert is suddenly overwhelmed by a familiar, searing wave of guilt. "Why am I feeling this way?" he wonders. "I’m doing everything right, and my parent is t
Joanna Szczeskiewicz
11 min read
Compassion is Not the Same as Help.
Have you ever stayed up all night worrying about the wellbeing of someone you care about? You might have just learnt about this person’s difficulties over the phone or, worse, learnt that they have been admitted to a hospital following a car accident. Such reactions are normal. Worrying is often an expression of caring, after all even though our hearts go to victims of all kinds of accidents, we are much more likely to lose sleep over the wellbeing of those we have close em
Joanna Szczeskiewicz
3 min read
From Pavlov's Dogs to Bad Vibes.
Have you ever felt “bad energy”? You might believe that some people create bad vibes and feel particularly uncomfortable with them. Some places give you chills. It feels as if you were absorbing something bad, something that invades your mind and body and that should simply not be there. What if the explanation of your experiences had more to do with classical conditioning than with exposure to bad energy? During the late nineteen century, a Russian physiologist, Ivan Pavl
Joanna Szczeskiewicz
4 min read
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